In order to fully use this site correctly, I would suggest using the links under the sidebar titled "Navigation." Within those links you will find links to all of my posts and they are organized by a category, then within that, each story or idea, then the order I intend them to be read in. So go check those out so that there is less of a chance for confusion! Thanks!
~Katelyn

Saturday, March 6, 2010

Touch

Something that could become a full fledged story.(Playlist at the bottom of the page)
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What was it about younger men that made their deaths so horrific? I thought as I exited the now silent hospital room.

The young man that occupied that room had been bleeding internally after a motorcycle accident. He had gasped and cried with horror in his every limb for two hours, and now he was finally dead.

Even I couldn't have said anything this time, it had been too similar.

A pair of yellow headlights blared straight ahead of me and I ignored them, shoving the image from my mind with a frown.

A female nurse rushed passed me a little too close and I felt the anxiety in her, it caught my attention. It wasn't the panic about her, that was normal, what peaked my interest was the insane confusion clouding her mind.

The emotions disappeared with the wind that brushed in between myself and the nurse almost running down the hall.

“We're losing her!” someone yelled just before giving a make way call down the aisle.

Five more nurses were rushing a stretcher toward the E.R.

I caught a glimpse of the possibly doomed person on the stretcher as I stepped out of the way.

The girl being rushed by wore a face contorted, yet empty and pale.

My whole body froze as the realization sank in.

No! I thought, feeling my own eyes widen.

By the time I was able to move, they had her in the now prepared room and more orders were being given and nurses flew in and out of the room.

I hesitantly entered the room. I was ignored as they fluttered about her, drawing blood, giving oxygen.

Nothing changed. Her heart accelerated as I stared at her and I felt someone's eyes on me.

I turned to see Jane, the blood nurse, giving me a look. She then shook her head and went back to work over the girls arm. She, like most of the other nurses in the room, knew that I was often present in these types of situations and that I wouldn't cause them any grief, so they left me be.

How could she still be alive? I thought in despair. Would I have to interfere?

I had gone back to staring at the condemned girl. She looked to be about the same age as me, a few years younger at the most. She couldn't have learned anything yet. Could I-?

Suddenly, in all the commotion, the young woman's face fell out of its painful place and relaxed. The only sound I heard was the heart monitor as her heart rate dropped and dropped and dropped.

I couldn't stay.

I practically stormed out of the room barely brushing the arm of another nurse as they came through the doorway. My expression had shocked and almost scared him.

I absolutely had to leave. I had to be as far away from that girl as I could. I couldn't let myself get even close to considering what I had just thought. So, she was going to die, big deal. She seemed okay with it.

Yes, I was running away.

I went to my place, paced the entire floor space, threw things, held my head and screamed. Why wouldn't it leave me alone? The picture of her face and the slight feeling of peace I barely felt that had to be radiating from her suddenly.

I stayed there holed up in my house for three days. Even though I knew she was dead by now, I couldn't let myself be among people yet.

I went back to the hospital. I was getting close to my limit.

“Landon. Where have you been?” Annette asked as I passed the front desk.

“Just taking a break.” I mumbled not meeting her gaze.

She nodded. “Good. You looked a little bothered when that girl came in.”

I tensed.

“Good news though.” she continued.

My head shot up.

“She recovered.” she finished with a smile.

It took me a moment to register that she had actually spoken the words.

“What?” I asked a little too sternly, “What had been wrong with her?” I quickly recovered.

“A number of things really.” Annette began. “Mal-nutrition, anemia, under weight, and that was all backed up with depression.”

“So she basically had stopped eating.” I concluded.

“Pretty much.” Annette said with a sigh. “Her body was at its limit and then suddenly...” she shrugged, “It fought back.”

I slowly straightened myself after realizing I had leaned in to hear her better.

That was what had been wrong with her. I had panicked over nothing. I had almost...

I shook my head to make the thought go away. A part of me knew that now that the mystery was solved I had no reason to think about her again. I thought this just as another part of me wondered why. Why had she stopped eating? Would she get like that again?

It was when I found myself walking down an unfamiliar street as the sun came down with a paper in my hand that I realized that that side had won.

I was going to find her. The paper in my hand was the one I had scribbled her address on before I left the hospital.

It had agonized me all day once I found out that she had just left an hour before I returned. All of her information had still been in the room, but all I got was her address. The rest I would leave to learn the right way. Or as close as I could allow myself to get to right.

I now stood a block away from her house ready to check on her.

She wouldn't instinctively know I was there. I wasn't a hunter.

I watched her at some point everyday for the next month. Every time I hid in view of a window I swore it was the last time even though I knew very well that I'd be back again the next day.

Her recovery, or change as it was for me, had been faster than anyone could have hoped for.

Color had filled her face like the rising sun, she was stronger, quicker. She was healthy, radiating, beautiful even.

My beautiful Ariah.

Only a few hours ago had someone said hello to her on the street also noticing her new stature.

Since then I'd been watching her with a new reverence.

“Ariah.” they'd said. I was still marveling over it.

This particular evening was a cold one. Rain threatened above me, but I didn't care.

She was dancing to music again, as had become ritual while she made dinner since the first night. Her hair was down and it flipped around as she swayed to the generally cheerful tune.

“New hobby, Landon?” A heavy voice said behind me.

I spun around startled.

I had been so deep into my moment of joy that I had not noticed anyone approach. Now Derek stood a short distance behind me with a stern frown on his face. I frowned back. Then turned back to Ariah, although I didn't entirely see her, I was still concentrating on Derek.

“What does she know?” he asked gravely.

“Nothing.” I answered with the same tone. “She doesn't know I'm here.”

Derek was silent; I could tell he was processing what I said.

“Don't reveal us, lad.” It was hard for me to tell if it was a word of caution or a threat.

A moment later I was alone again and it began to rain. I stayed there in the cold until it became so thick that my vision was blurred. It was still difficult to make myself leave.

At the end of nearly two weeks of not seeing her, I returned home as the sun was going down since I wasn't doing any good at the hospital. I spent the whole day distracted in the hospital thinking about her. Had anything changed?

I went into the bathroom and gripped the side of the sink looking into the mirror, but it wasn't my own face I saw. Ariah's face smiling and singing was in front of me, but she never met my gaze. I splashed my face with water and once I opened my eyes I peered into them, tired and wiry, her image had disappeared. I called it back and it was less clear than it had been a moment ago. Panicked, my breathing accelerated and I grabbed at my memory at the sole picture that mattered, but it only continued to fade away from me.

A moment later, without my realizing it, I was out the door as fast as I would dare to go. It wasn't too long before I was on her street yet again. It was only now as my anxiety lessened that I looked around me, seeing that the street itself remained the same as the last time I had seen it. Then I noticed that night had long ago set in, she would have gone to bed by now. To my horror, my suspicion was confirmed as I laid eyes on her dark and empty window. But I had to see her!

I began to run around the outside of the building, there had to be a way in! I then came to a sudden stop.

Before me lay an open window.

Before I had only ever concentrated on the one window at the front never daring to get as close as to inspect further, but here it was and I could hear a deep breathing coming from inside.

I didn't hesitate before silently lifting myself in. I lowered myself quickly but softly to the floor and landed right next to her asleep in her bed.

I knew she was in the deepest part of sleep. Her face was relaxed and looked soft in the small light and her lips were parted slightly. Her hair was strewn on the pillow over her head and the blanket was pulled up over her ear. I could barely see the rest of her curled outline under the thick covers as she was snuggled into the wall on the twin sized mattress.

I froze with my hand hovering inches from the side of her face. My ears were suddenly filled with the sound of my heart accelerating and I forced myself to move away from her step by step. It took so much effort to make my legs move while the whole of my being wanted to go the other direction. Eventually, I bumped into the windowsill. My breathing beginning to come in gasps once again; I turned away and through the window and nearly ran home without turning back.

Immediately, I got into the shower, shouting when my body shivered violently, the cold having awakened against the hot water. I held my head bowed under the water with my hands spread out in front of me on the wall and I breathed. What I had almost done flashed before me and I slammed my fists on the wall with a holler. It wasn't the first time I hated myself.

I knew I couldn't push myself that far again, I might end up going too far, but I also couldn't be watching her as much as I had been. So, I decided to allow myself a short time once a day, but even as I watched from a farther distance on a neighboring roof, not even in a window, I felt agitated and worried. I sighed in frustration with closed eyes as I clutched my bent knees, the sun casting orange and pink over my skin. It was time for me to go, I'd already passed my time limit, but I didn't want to. I argued with myself giving a hundred reasons why I could stay, ones like that no one would notice me unless they were looking for me-

Derek.

He would be looking for me. I should leave. I was only putting her in danger.
I got up and determinedly headed for home, thinking that there was nothing I could do right as I watched the shadows for Derek.

It had been a while since I'd done a night shift at the hospital, so I then decided to go there and try to do someone some good.

I wasn't too far from the hospital when two police cars sped passed me, their sirens blaring. They continued on in the direction I had just come from.

I did not hesitate and ran full sprint, not caring who saw me, back towards Ariah's house. Once I was a block away, I saw the police cars parked in front of her place. I went back towards my spot on the roof.

As I ascended I watched the scene, seeing the landlady hysterically explaining to the officers what had happened.

“I was just bringing the poor girl some cake! She is so kind and so lonely.” Her voice had risen and the officer taking notes was calming her and she continued her story.

“It's usually this time of day when she is home and making herself dinner and listening to music, so I thought she'd be home. I went to the door and there was music as usual, you know and I knocked on the door, but she didn't answer. So I thought that maybe the music was too loud or she was in the bathroom for a moment, so I let myself in, I have a key,” she held up the key for the officer to see, “and I was going to leave the cake there with a note, but when I opened the door she wasn't there at all and there was a chair turned over and all sorts of things around the room scattered.” she had started to panic again and the police man was handing her a tissue.

It was at this point that I reached the place where I sat, but I was still watching the scene until I noticed something white out of the corner of my eye. Pushed onto a nail that was sticking out of the small wood railing was a piece of paper fluttering in the wind.

I knelt down and pulled it off the nail and in a swirly scroll it read:

I warned you, Landon.

I stared at the page frozen in horror when the landlady's voice broke through again.

“You have to hurry!” She said through tears. “Her dinner was only starting to burn on the stove when I found it! They can't be too far!”

That must have only been about ten or fifteen minutes and Derek had to have taken the time to set up his kidnap, he had covered himself well. I could still save her.

I climbed down from the rooftop and sneaked passed the police cars and once I was completely out of sight I ran.

I knew generally where Derek lived and I headed in that direction skidding as I came around corners. Derek might not have taken her to his place, but I still had to look there.

My panic slowly turned into anger as I ran and then into rage and I let that drive me, become my strength.

It took a little time, but I finally reached it. It was a small mansion just on the outskirts of town, old, but in good condition.

In one swift kick I knocked aside the door throwing caution to the wind and bellowed “DEREK!!”

My voice echoed in the vast entryway. No one was in this dark front room. Was I to search every room? I took a few hasty, but cautious steps inside when I heard a loud thud from underneath me. I turned and raced back outside and around to the side of the house. Before me lay a basement door, just as I'd thought.

I ran towards the dim light down the stairs. Once I cleared the ceiling the first thing I saw was Ariah on the floor with Derek standing over her.

Derek turned his head, having heard me come down. There was a gleam in his eye and a villainous sneer on his face.

“Oh, Landon.” he said with a chuckle. “I almost thought you wouldn't come.”

This surprised me for a moment. He wanted me here? I quickly gained back my composure and glared at
him. I didn't need to say anything; he knew why I was here.

He faced me and began to speak with his hands behind his back. “I originally intended just to get rid of her, but once it began! Dear boy, I had to savor it.”

I continued to stare him down. “She knows nothing.” I said each word calmly, but with a threat behind them.
Derek's laugh boomed and bounced off of the walls. “But Landon! She knows everything!” He stared back at me a crazed look in his eyes, his teeth gleaming. “I've been searching for my answer for more than two hundred years! And no other knowledge I've obtained has thrilled me more than this.” He then became serious. “She has the answer Landon.” Derek stepped aside so that I could see her fully.

Ariah was sprawled out on the floor as if she had been dropped there involuntarily. She was even paler than she was the day I had seen her on the brink of death in the hospital. Her chest wasn't moving.

“Would you like to finally find it?” Derek asked holding his hand out toward her.

Enraged, I let out a war cry and ran at him grabbing him around the waist and sending us both flying. We fell into a pile of boxes and struggled in their depths, until Derek managed to get a good grip on me and threw me off of him. I sailed into the opposite wall and something seared into my arm and I screamed. I was breathing hard as I sank to the floor warm fluid running through my fingers as they clutched my wound.

Derek gave a low grunt as he hoisted himself out of the boxes. “Fine.” he said walking over to Ariah.

“You’re giving me no choice, Landon.” he said as I tried to lift myself off of the floor. “I was going to spare her a little longer for your sake, but...” he then easily picked her up around the waist and held her to himself with his hand on the side of her face. He closed his eyes and smiled almost as if he were enjoying a pleasant memory.

“No!” I screamed finally being able to jump up from the floor.

Then the room seemed to explode with noise as seven individuals ran in from behind me.

“Drop the girl Derek!” it was a voice I recognized, but I couldn't feel relief and held my breath until Derek lowered Ariah to the floor with a glare.

Derek sighed. “I see.” he said sounding disappointed. He watched us all for a moment and then moved to run, but he wasn't fast enough. Four men grabbed him and held him before he could escape. He struggled against them, but it did him no good. “I was doing you a favor.” he seethed through gritted teeth.

The men began to drag him past me. He struggled to keep his eyes on me and I could feel them boring into my back. “He was going to ruin us!” he hollered as he disappeared up the stairs.

I was still having a hard time catching my breath and my eyes stayed locked on Ariah, she lay, unmoving on the floor.

“Landon?”

I turned to see Joseph walking towards me. “Are you okay, son?”

He wasn't really my father, but had been a better one than I could have asked for in my condition.

I closed my eyes and shook my head. “Yeah, but...” I said, then the panic sunk back in again.

I ran to her.

“Ariah.” I said grieved. I didn't know what to do and my hands hovered over her without a purpose.

Her eyes were barely open and obviously rolling into the back over her head. I could barely hear her breathing coming in short and slow rasps.

I felt my eyes water as a moan escaped my lips. Then there was a hand on my head.

“Here.” Joseph said softly handing me his own long jacket. “The more layers that you can put between her skin and yours the longer it'll take for anything else to happen.”

I took it from him slowly at first taking in what he said, then he continued, “Once you're sure she's okay, we expect you to come talk to us, Landon.” He was being firm.

“Thank you.” I managed to mutter.

Kara, who was also there, came over to us on the other side of Ariah. She was wearing long sleeves. She reached down and picked her up with ease. “Here.” she said.

I held my arms out and Joseph draped his coat over them, and she was lowered into my arms.

I looked at her, stunned for a moment as the warmth of her body reached my own and then I felt it.

It was very dim at first but it slowly became clear, the haze that she was in could now be felt in my own body.

“Landon.” someone said, breaking me out of my trance. “Run.”

I held her tighter to me and took off as fast as I dared.

Just as slow as the first feeling came other feelings from before and also memories.

I could see what I assumed were her hands stirring a pan of rice in her kitchen. She lowered the spoon and turned around.

Derek stood before her. His black hair and nearly as black eyes were new to her. She didn't have a chance to scream as he grabbed her quickly and put his hand over her mouth.

There was no sound as she slowly found herself unable to move and she fell into his arms.

I could feel it as she had felt herself slowly becoming weaker as he took her away to his house. She was hardly aware of what was happening as she was lowered to the floor. There was a voice, but she couldn't understand what it was saying and then there was a hand caressing her check.

Suddenly I felt a rage of fire in my own heart understanding how Derek had begun to draw it out.

She felt confused and tired when she heard our fighting. Then a sudden sense of security as she caught a glimpse of my face above her and then it all faded to black.
 

The vision was gone and I was in sight of the hospital.

No! I was not going to lose her when I was so close.

My arm started to ache and I felt my pulse in my head. My feet started to slow, but I pushed them faster. I dodged cars leaving the parking lot near the emergency room and pushed my way through the doors. It took only a moment for me to catch someone’s attention, then I didn’t need to say a word. 

They took her out of my arms and laid her on a stretcher. It was all too familiar to when I first laid eyes on
her, but my suspicion from then was true now. I was still anxious and made to follow them when Annette stopped me in my tracks.

“Landon.” She gasped, then she caught sight of my arm. “Come on.” She ordered.

I tried to protest, as she knew I would, but I was too weak to really fight it. I must have lost too much blood.

I was dragged to a small room once Annette handed me over to a nurse that I was unfamiliar with; giving me an anxious and worried glance as she walked back to her desk.

The nurse almost pushed me onto the examining table and began to tend my wound. I was sure my face looked extremely ill because she didn’t ask any questions. She was impassive. I kept my eyes to the floor although I didn’t see it and my other hand was on my forehead.

“Here.” She said when she was finished, another nurse had brought juice for the blood loss and she was handing it to me.

I didn’t want it or need it, but I had to make them happy if I was going to check on Ariah any time soon, so I drank the cup in one swallow.

The nurses left and once they were out of sight I slid off of the table, cringing when my arm hurt, and slowly walked out of the room and made my way back to the waiting room.

“Where is she?” I asked Annette.

She nodded toward the third door down the hall giving me a concerned glance. What was my expression telling her? I was still too weak to realize much. I nodded and tapped the desk with my hand looking around the room while sighing to show her my thanks. Then I leaned back carefully in a chair in a good view of the room, resting my injury on its cold back. There was still a good amount of activity going on. I had to stay out of there until they were...finished.

I sat in the chair ignoring the screaming children, panicked family members, all the buzz of the room meant nothing to me. Until a police officer came up to the front desk.

The only thing that moved were my eyes as they flickered up to the desk.

I couldn’t hear them, but Annette nodded toward Ariah’s room. I watched the officer closely as he took a moment to peek in the room then give a short call on his walkie-talkie. Then he walked back to Annette and asked her something else. With a frown she signaled toward me. I looked him in the eyes as he came toward me, but did not get up from my seat. It was all business for him, and he was generally calm for now.

The officer now stood in front of me and I looked back at him in what I felt was a slightly defiant glare.

“Are you the one that brought Miss Keenan?”

I entwined my fingers together and set them on my forehead and closed my eyes. “Yeah.” I said with a sigh.

“I’m Officer Seaver.” I could sense that he had put his hand for me to shake, but didn’t respond since my eyes were closed. He felt awkward and embarrassed, but lowered it and continued. “Miss Keenan had been reportedly kidnapped an hour ago, and now you’ve brought her here.” He paused. I waited. “Would you like to tell me what happened?”

“I-“ I said, purposely hesitating, I didn’t know my story yet. I made my frustration more visible that I usually did by closing my eyes tighter. “I can’t talk about this right now. She-“

I stopped, knowing Officer Seaver understood.

“Okay,” he pulled up a chair and sat down next to me, but still kept his distance. With a lowered voice he asked, “Can you at least tell me a little about the kidnapper, they might still be-“

I interrupted, “He’s long gone by now. It was dark; I didn’t get a good look at him. He didn’t put up much of a fight though. I don’t think he’d try anything again any time soon.”

Not that he’ll get the chance. I added to myself. He had done a serious offense.

“But you’re sure they were male?” Seaver pressed.

I let out a small laugh. “Yeah.”

Then my head shot up as I felt the fading adrenaline of a nurse as she left Ariah’s room and spoke to
Annette.

The nurse walked away and Annette looked to me, that was all I needed.

I got up out of my seat and headed straight toward the door of the room. I wasn’t aware if the officer followed me or not.

Once I reached the doorway I stopped and slowly walked into the room as if I were checking on a sleeping infant.

Ariah lay in the bed, all hooked up to machinery, but stable.

I let out the breath that I hadn’t realized I was holding.

I closed the door only taking my eyes off of her for that brief second. Then, I went and sat in the chair next to her bed as quietly as I could.

I wanted to let her know I was there, but I had no desire to touch her.

“Ariah.” I whispered, reaching out and touching the blanket lightly with my fingertips. All she felt was sleep.

She would be all right. I sighed in relief. That was when my phone vibrated in my pocket.

“Hello?” I answered, rubbing my eyes, I suddenly felt very tired.

“Is she alright?” It was Joseph.

“Yeah.” I answered.

“Well, we’re waiting.” He said, not being stern.

“I can’t leave her yet. I want to be here when she wakes up.” I said.

He paused, then said. “Landon, you know it’ll take at least three days for her to wake up. We’ll be finished with you before then.”

I flinched. He sounded like he was preparing to punish me, which he just might be.

“Well, I’m not getting out of here until I have a story. There’s an officer asking questions.” I told him. “I already said that I didn’t get a good look at Derek.”

“That’s good.” Joseph congratulated me. Then we spent the next few minutes creating a lie.

Then I waited. I wasn’t going to come to them. I didn’t think about much, I just listened to her breathe.

It wasn’t too long before the door opened and a man walked in without a word closing the door behind him.
He appraised the room a moment then turned to me.

Gesturing his head to Ariah, he said to me, “So, you want to tell me what happened, kid?”

I slowly turned my head to face him with one eyebrow raised. I didn’t like how he was talking to me, especially in front of Ariah, even though she wasn’t awake.

There was a glitter in his blue eyes. “Detective Michael O’Sheah.” He said not offering his hand, which I was grateful for.

He walked toward the other side of the bed and looked at Ariah’s face. “So, you rescued her?” he asked without turning his gaze.

I tensed as he got closer to her. 

“Yeah, I…had a fight with my dad and I was walking around town to cool off. “ I started.

“Do, you always walk around town, or out of town?” he interrupted giving me a somewhat suspicious look.

That caught me off guard and I stared at him in horror.

Detective O’Shea flashed a grin at me.

“I had been keeping tabs on Ariah,” he nodded toward her. “The hospital had asked me to; just to make sure she wouldn’t let herself get put in the hospital again.” He sighed then, looking at her sleeping figure, “Not everything is in her power though.”

“But how?” I murmured.

“I saw you after she got kidnapped and followed you.”

I felt myself starting to become really scared. I hadn’t seen him.

“But why didn’t you help?” I tried to keep my voice down. “Why did you just watch?”

“I knew you guys could take care of it.” He answered simply with a half smile.

Before I could respond he spoke again, “What’s your name, kid?”

“Landon.” I answered, though my expression remained unchanged.

“How old are you?” Michael put his hands together behind his back and began to walk around the bed toward me.

“Nineteen.” I said as I watched him.

“Really?” he asked with an eyebrow raised.

I snapped out of my trance and glared at him keeping my mouth shut. I knew he wasn’t telling me something.

“Hmm.” He said sounding pleased. 

“You don’t hide yourself well, Landon.” He then leaned toward me putting both ends on the edge of the seat.

I stared back at him not intimidated. I knew I could overpower him if I needed to.

“Luckily, for you,” he whispered. “I used to be one of you guys.”

The tension left with him as he stood straight again, but I still wasn’t saying anything. 

Michael folded his arms, now standing at the foot of Ariah’s bed looking at her with a sad expression.

Somberly, he then said, “All I need to know before she wakes up is if he got away.” He did not turn his gaze.

I stared at him for a moment, “He didn’t.” I answered with confidence.

Detective Michael O’Sheah nodded and left the room without another word.

I stayed almost frozen where I was, stunned. I racked my memory for Michael, but I couldn’t find him there.

It wasn’t too long before I decided to go see The Council. I stood and took one last look at Ariah. She was asleep, which was probably the best I could ask for regarding what she had just been through. It took another moment, but I was finally able to tear myself away and out the door. She would be fine, and I would be back soon.

I was in a bit of a hurry, but trying not to make it obvious, making a great effort to control my pace. I stopped at the front desk.

“Annette-“ I began, but she interrupted me.

“I’ll let you know.” She said keeping her eyes on the papers on her desk.

“Thank you.” I whispered sincerely and I was on my way again. “I’ll be back!” I hollered behind me.




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Life's

Another mood piece. Mostly anger and frustration, but it sparked another possible story.
It's how I deal...
It was also the first one that I ever saw as being a possible movie. My attempt at the tiniest bit of a script will be added at the bottom.
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True love? No, that doesn't exist in this world. Just like young men with inner demons don't wisk you away from your spiritually abusive parents. They couldn't possibly exist because that's not reality. Fiction's purpose is to pull away from reality. Anything can happen and the author has the power to change anything. Why can't we change reality? There are no heros. No good vs evil, only evil. The middle man never wins. Youth have no power, no voice. Only the cries and screams of a broken heart that no one hears.

Real love can't exist in the human world. Everything has to fight against it; destroy it if it doesn't destroy itself. The slightest doubt and it's gone. The very definition of who you are is gone. I strictly remember how it felt. No other pain can compare. Nothing can repair it: the betrayal. I don't think any one will ever get it right.

When you lose who you are everything becomes meaningless. You can work for years putting everything you can into writing a book with a message or at least a hope that your words will help someone else, but when its finished and it's just like the other book next to it on the shelf, what was the point? No one really wants to listen to what you have to say.

There's nothing left on this earth that is truly important when love can be destroyed. It is, by definition, unconditional, but there are always exceptions. Without that everything is empty.

What is there left to live for? What are we living for anyway? To join some God when we die and achieve greater happiness and perfection? For all we know it could be all a lie, our memories erased of our sentence. Banished to this earth to meet evil's destruction at the end.

Everyone has a mask, a reason to sit and stare at nothing, depressed and weak, unable to see past their lost purpose. When they are no longer alone they smile, deceiving everyone. I can see the beneficial side to this: Spare others the pain and sorrow. But at the same time isn't it just lying about how you're truly feeling?

When no one knows your pain, who you are, how can you be saved?

There are too many questions and no where near enough answers.

All I can do is fall to my knees and cry, “I don't know, I don't know.”
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(Black screen)

Narrator(main girl): True love?

Flash black and white or grayscale scene of couple kissing. It is the narrator, but it doesn't last long enough for anyone to tell.

Narrator:No, that doesn't exist in this world.

Sunrise, sky, town or city scanning...opening music and title.

Just like young men with inner demons...

Pounding Beat

I turned it up louder as if that could make the thoughts go away. They had to disappear if I was going to keep my mouth shut. Maybe I just liked the pounding beat in my ears that seemed to change the very rhythm of my heart. Control. It's what I had been working on for a good two and a half months. I remembered moments ago clutching the chair arm, letting my nails dig into it. Then the slight relief as I prevailed, withholding my thoughts and justice and the disappointment in there having been no change. If there was anything I wanted more than a peace of mind about how he and I felt it would have been for him* to have an open mind and listen. Not see me as a nearly seventeen-year old girl, but as someone who truly understood how people truly should be and were, with the right observance. Either that or the elimination of the problem. The last seems more likely other than the elimination of my presence since I know that the fire will not be removed from his eyes, the wind in his ears to hear any if at all my voice.

Sight-Overwhelming Darkness

The post "Sight Idea" was what later inspired another story. It is one of my favorites that I have come up with so far. This is the first bit that I came up with for this story. The others you can find on my Ideas page under the title Sight. Playlist
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I wrapped my arms around my waist, biting my lip and closing my eyes tightly. I didn’t want to see anymore. I felt infected, possessed. I had to hold myself in or keep them out before I lost control. It seemed like everything was closing in on me and I had no power to send the prowling demons away. I knew they had followed me home and were making efforts to enter me. They were trying so hard and I fought against them all silently in the dark.

Tears flew from my eyes as they shot open. The sound of my phone ringing had broken through the despair momentarily. I sniffled as I reached down and found my bag digging my phone out of it. Jake was calling.

I let myself take a deep breath and began to shake once I did.

“Hello.” I flinched when my voice cracked.

 “Where’d you go?” he asked somewhat harshly.

“Home.” I moaned. The air was starting to get heavier again as the images flashed in my head.

“Are you okay?” The worry was now evident in his voice.

“I-I don’t know.” I admitted and I slowly lowered myself to my side curling up into a ball again.

“Should I come over?” He seemed unsure and I could just imagine how his eyebrows were probably furrowed together at that very moment.

I bit my lip accepting that I couldn’t do this alone. That I was weak.

I began to cry again. “Please.” I begged.

“Alright…” he sighed softly. “Should I get-“

“No.” I interrupted. Gabriel didn’t need to be in this too. “But hurry.”

“I’m coming.” He said. I could hear his car starting in the background.

He didn’t hang up like I had expected him to. He knew without me having to tell him that left alone now, I might not make it.

I concentrated on the sound of his purring engine and breathed slowly and for a while we sat in silence.

“Jake.” I whispered. “Why…” I began.

It was his turn to interrupt me now.

“Because even angels fall.”

I whimpered burying my face into the covers.

“I know, honey. I’m here.”

His voice was suddenly a lot closer and light drifted into the room.

He crossed the room carefully, getting on his knees in front of me at the end of the bed.

I watched his face once it was at my eye level. It was solemn, his eyes pained as he looked me over. I could only imagine how awful I must have looked. He moved my hair that was sticking to my forehead. I stared at him pleadingly. He said nothing picking me up from where I cowered and sat himself where I had been, setting me into his chest and wrapping his arms around me protectively but tenderly.

I could hear his heart. Its rhythm accelerating, but still steady. He was concentrating and I closed my eyes searching for the light I knew was coming to rescue me.

It was like a spark. Just a small glimmer of warmth and it was enough.

My eyes opened then and they were illuminated, glowing. I knew the way they now looked: White and brilliant, no iris, no pupil. Giving me the sight that only I could posses and due to the arms wrapped around me, Jacob could too.

Though we temporarily shared this ability, Jacob's eyes remained normal, human. He appraised the room around us moving only his eyes, his expression forelorn, threatening. I turned my head out of his chest and stared at my attackers.

The room was filled with them, demons squeezing into every available space. Heads only partially through the walls or hanging from the ceiling to watch, to witness.

Five black-eyed figures stood directly before us, the rest consisted of the red and yellow-eyed ones. Most of the hunters wore sinister grins, but one, the one in the center, mirrored Jacob's expression. I knew he was the leader, serious as he was. He did not look at me, he stared at Jacob challenging him. I was the prize and he was the protector.

The others fiddled around excitedly. To them I was just a hound dog, a slave and they knew nothing of Jacob. The leader could see who he was and knew the danger. He was being careful, especially since he was not sure of what to do. He had no idea of what action to take, but Jacob did.

His body tensed, his embrace tightening, but he remained calm. His eyes made one last sweep of the room concentrating again on the leader once finished.

I watched his mouth as he spoke.

"Get" the small ember began to grow, consuming and soothing me. "out."

The flame roared and exploded engulfing the room and everything in it in a blinding white light. 
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Sight

In odd, or intense moods I tend to write the easiest, the purest, the most detailed, and the darkest. It was in one of these moods that this come out.(Playlist at the bottom of the page)
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No one can see like I can. And it is not a sight that can be learned or taught. It is a solitary, unexplainable gift that, as far as I know, I alone have; what separates me from the temptations of this world that change humans to demons so easily. Human beings are clearly out numbered in this day and age, if there are even any left not tainted. A newborn is clean and clear in most cases, but it doesn't take long for the darkness to reach them. So, why am I different? Why am I the sole perfect one left? Well, I'm not so sure that I am. I feel rage and jealousy, sadness and pain, desire and selfishness. I can just see what others can't. Perhaps the true right and wrong. Or maybe what someone has become; who they are and why. I could be meant to change something on this earth or simply one person. Maybe my purpose is to save one person from this seemingly inevitable fate, remove the demon, clean the soul. So that they'd have a chance to turn the world around.
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Luke

Another random idea.
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“I...”

He shuffled around on his toes nervously.

“Luke-What're you-” I questioned as he continued to practically pace.

“I...” he said again.

He then stopped suddenly looking me straight in the eyes. He took a deep breath then grabbed me and kissed me.

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Something shifted in the trees and I froze myself in place listening further, but afraid to hear what was out there. I didn't hear the sound again and began to calm down when I sensed something behind me. Hot air blew over my elbow. I knew that whatever was behind me had to be an animal, a bear maybe. The worst thing I could do would be to turn around and look it in the eyes or run away from it. So, I decided to walk away slowly.

I took a step forward and air blew around me and suddenly I was face to face with the animal. Its head was lowered to my level, its long muzzle inches from my face, and it was covered from head to tail in fur that was a mix of grays and light browns. I was in the presence of a giant wolf.

I gasped. I couldn't help myself; who could after being stunned like I was.

It watched me as I appraised the wonder of its existence with nearly honey-brown eyes. How could this creature have the same eyes as Luke? It didn't look menacing either, but soft maybe even concerned.

Before I had a chance to react, the wolf reached out, gently brushing the side of its muzzle from my jaw to hairline. It pulled back again burying me in its worried eyes. I blinked, no longer frozen, no longer feeling afraid. It must have seen the calm in my eyes because it then moved forward putting the end of its nose under my hand and raising it slowly.

“Luke?” I barely whispered.

He wagged his tail in confirmation.

I instantly wrapped my arms around his neck, rubbing my face in his fur.

“I'm so sorry.” I wailed. “Luke, I'm so sorry.”

Luke rubbed my back with his head trying to soothe me.

Everything strange that he had done made so much sense now and I felt so much at fault for not understanding. I expected him to say that it wasn't, but it was. I had been so blind to what he must have been going through. I owed him so much.

The price I knew I had to pay somehow overwhelmed me and I began to sink to my knees.
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And this idea continues! --->

Red Eyes

A brief clip from a third version of Michael and Nicole. This was all I ever did for it.
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The red eyes hit me like the wind had been knocked out of my lungs and I backed into the wall behind me. They pressed me back harder as they stared at me and all I could do was stare back with wide eyes. The rain ran down the back of my neck and along my spine like ice. The hairs on my arms stood up.

A low growl that was almost a purr escaped from the creature's chest. Then it swiftly turned and disappeared into the dark.

Pondering

I'll come up with meaning of things or inquiries as just simple sentences. This list will grow as time goes on.
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The voice is the human's most powerful weapon. Now what does someone do when even that can't save them?

What else is there to live for, but the hope that the next day will have something more than the day before?

Sanctuary: The place you run to, not from.

Anger is only the mask of sadness.

A hero is the one that pulls you from the dark, especially if you're the one who turned out the light.

Love cannot be seen or felt in a touch longer than a moment and only rarely is it purely spoken in words. It is a feeling, a force, that survives the hurricanes and the fires and it lasts even after death stronger than ever.

It's that moment when you find yourselves breathing the same air...

The Service

Notes I took for an idea and so forth.
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-“The Service”

-“The Enemy”

-Lies about age

-Almost chosen off the streets

-Erased from existence…or want to be.

-Old partner had to be killed was enemy spy.

-Guy friend or foe? Undercover?

-“I’ll come back for you.”

-“The Enemy” can’t know age…could do things to her.

-No one knows “The Enemy” who they are or that they are even there….

-Organization within a nation…All kept from the rest of the country.

-Youth disappear/fall prey.

-Go in pairs…only one of the pair knows the true mission and destination, all other information. Other does what they are told. Can only trust each other…or can they?

-Only partner knows her age…but chose her anyway…didn’t tell rest of team/organization/whatever.

-Usually pairs of the same gender…but higher rank got to choose…or no one else was capable.

-Special mission. “Behind enemy lines” “Into the Lions den.”

-Don’t know about it until it happens to you.

-Tells past…about other partner…afraid and longing.

-Become close…more than partners…maybe more than friends.

-Only those that realize people have gone missing…weren’t affected by them being erased from existence by the enemy now working for them. They erase their memory too…or dispose of them if they’re a threat.

-“…both eyes open…Once you pull the trigger there’s no turning back!”
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I got this idea a few years back and didn’t do much more than think about it and even that was brief. It would have been more serious than some of my other ones and very technical.

This was a world where there were odd things going on within the government. Two sides, one trying to accomplish some unknown “evil” while the other tries to stop it. It goes on for years and years. Youth continue to disappear, but the public doesn’t notice since the individual is in essence erased from existence and therefore forgotten. There are only a few who notice the change and the main character is one of them.

This nameless character is female about sixteen years old when she finds herself deep within the government’s secrets. They bring her in to train her to become one of their soldiers to fight this enemy. Normally they wouldn’t take anyone so young, but she was specially chosen by a young man around the ages of 18-20, and he is the only one who knows her age.

She trains and is ready to do her job, but her partner is very mysterious. Rumors of a past partnership gone wrong bother her and while they are on a big mission she finally asks about it. He tells her that yes, he had another female partner (which is odd) and that she betrayed them and he had to kill her. It obviously bothers him. They start to become close.

In their mission they have to get into the enemy’s fortress and try to find out what’s going on. The girl ends up captured and in order to get the job done, the partner leaves her, but promises to come back. She waits and waits for who knows how long and he still doesn’t come. She is tortured and ill and her guard is the old partner that was supposed to be dead.

She now has to question her partner in his loyalty etc.

She somehow escapes on her own and finds her partner with his old partner and the old partner is saying that she was actually being a spy for their group. She doesn’t believe her and tries to kill her.

That’s as far as I got… I only ever wrote out what would have been an opening scene. She is just waking up in her cell after being captured. She would have told the story up to that point through flashbacks and it would have gone back and forth between the present and the past. Here’s the snippet:
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The sound of dripping water woke me from my stupor. The descending liquid continued to flow behind me and 1.83 meters to my left. This was the south end of the fortress and the farthest corner to the west. It must be raining outside.

I smelled the air, expecting to be filled with the refreshing aroma of rain, but I held my breath once I caught the smell of mold.

I wanted to cover my mouth and nose until the scent left my system. The shackles on my wrists chaining me to the ceiling prevented me from blocking the putrid smell. Still, I made an attempt to wiggle out of the chains, pulling myself upwards towards the ceiling, meanwhile pushing my wrists down.

As Empty As It Seemed

Another short story.
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As empty as it seemed, it felt like that there was inevitably something there. Something I was missing, the last piece hiding beneath my nose.

A clocked ticked loudly in my head.

I was running out of time.

I flipped through the pages once more opening my eyes wider to see anything and everything that could possibly be among the pages.

A glimmer, a flash. I didn’t know what it was that threw the candle’s flame across my eyes, but it caught my attention. I turned the pages back franticly when the book opened nearly on its own in front of me.

Embedded in a few pages was a ring. It was silver with the band coming around a light blue gem, with two small topaz, and clear stones on either side of it. My first name with his last were scribbled on the page.

Water welled up in my eyes. I had found what I was looking for, but I still had failed completely.

The doors burst open behind me, blowing out the candle on the desk. An orange glow flowed in in its place.

“Do you have it?” a strained voice asked between gasps of breath. “Do you have what he said would protect us?”

“Yes, William.” I managed to say between sobs, pulling my new treasure onto my left ring finger.
“Then, we should be getting out of this place.” William replied, with a more quiet voice and kinder tone.
There was a roar above and a crash, rumbling the entire building. Dust began to fall from the stone ceilings. I held the ring on my finger to my heart, taking in whatever power it possessed and hoping to make it a part of me.

William strolled into the room, gently prying my hand from my chest and taking it in his own.

I looked up at him, and his eyes were frantic, but somber.

“Come Rachel, it’s what he said to do.” Tears pooled in my eyes again, and he took my chin under his fingertips.” I swore to him that I would protect my little sister, and to my last breath I will.”

I nodded, too emotional to speak. I was leaving him to destruction, pain, and anguish. There was so much I would be risking.

I took William's hand in my left one, grasping it for a moment, trying to be brave.

There was another crash and a torch tumbled to the ground, making the elegant tapestry go up in flames. The fires were roaring in our ears along with another cry from upstairs, and we ran.

Our feet clambered loudly on the stone floor, the castle slowly falling to pieces behind us, but we didn’t look back.

Outside the wind was blowing our now visible breath past our heads as we continued into the forest. I looked back only for a moment to see the castle, our home, our history, going up in flames. The shadows engulfed us as soon as we were within the trees with only a small amount of moonlight grazing our faces now and then. A howl echoed behind us, and William ran faster, dragging me behind him.

It seemed like we were running for hours, and the temperature had been dropping all the while. My throat had been feeling like I had been inhaling razor sharp shards of ice as we ran. My limbs were numb, but my legs were beginning to feel like gelatin.

“Will,” I gasped, surprising too quiet even for myself to hear, “William, please.” He began to slow, noticing my voice. “Please, we must stop.” My feet planted themselves on the ground, pulling my brother back.

“We cannot!” He turned to face me, grasping both of my wrists fiercely, spittle flew on my face, and his eyes were wild. “If we stop, he could find you and-and-“

“William.” I pleaded. “We must, we’ll be safe. Now we must rest.”

He stared into my eyes for a moment, resisting the urge to argue, his chest heaving in and out as he gasped for air.

“Alright. Yes, you are right…rest; we need…” he stumbled a few feet turning from me, his hand almost leaving my ringed one. I grabbed it again.

“But do not, do not, let go of this hand. Do you understand?” I put as much seriousness as I could manage into my voice.

“Of course dear sister.” He mumbled.

We then walked, searching for a small place of shelter. We were unable to find much besides a small grove of trees that would at least be comfortable to lie on. I lowered myself to the ground and William surprised me by pulling a bag off of his back with necessary things for survival. Food, bandages, clothes, and blankets were in the pack. Last but not least, were a gun and a knife at the very bottom, signifying that they were the first items of his choice. I eyed them, almost in disbelief as William observed their condition. After a moment, he then handed me the pistol. I looked at him questioningly.

“Why don’t you have it? I know how to handle a knife, not a pistol.” I tried to hand it back to him.

He pushed it back in my hand, eyebrows raised. “I am hoping he will not get that close.”

We got ourselves comfortable, still not letting go of each other’s hands, falling asleep wrapped in the blankets William had brought.

In the time from when we had lied down to when the sky began to lighten between the trees, I had not slept. All I could do was worry about him, and how we left him behind to face the terror alone. I started to cry again, wanting to help him, but knowing there was nothing I could possibly do, except to survive. My tears froze in the middle of my checks.

There was a rustle in the trees and footsteps on the leaves. I made myself immobile.

From the direction of the castle came a large animal from the trees. It came slowly and calmly toward me. The closer it got the clearer it became. It was dark brown and easily as large as a bear, but as graceful as a cat and as majestic as a lion. I was not afraid, but awed. The creature approached me, sniffing as it came. It stood next to me, away from William, and I could feel the heat off of its body.

I watched its paws, noticing that they were larger than my hands. Its head hovered over me as it sniffed my left hand and the ring on it. After raising its head, it laid itself on the ground next to me and I finally looked at its eyes.

His eyes were topaz, as were this giant wolf’s. They were somber and pleading. I could almost see him in his eyes.

I was overwhelmed with emotion throwing my arms around his neck and I began to weep. He was here. He was safe. And since he was, I was as well. Shane rubbed his large head gently against me, mopping up my tears. I moved myself against him taking in the warmth, then pulling the blanket over him as the sun began to rise and the softness of his fur began to fade.

I held onto him as he struggled no knowing what else to do. I watched his face become the one I knew so well, the snout turned and shrunk into a nose, along with the rest of his features that shrank to their original state. I kept my eyes on his as soon as the process was done. They were mostly closed and blurred. He looked absolutely exhausted.

“Isaac…” I whispered. “Isaac, speak to me.”

He didn’t respond except for an exhale of breath and he shuddered from the cold. Instantly, I wrapped the blanket tighter around him pulling myself against him, now sharing my warmth since he now had no other protection from the world.

On my other side William stirred in his sleep, then jumped up roaring a call of war. I knew he was only reacting to no longer feeling my hand in his and I didn’t move or say a word.