Savior

 This is a more detailed and different version of What Do You Say?. So it has some of the same lines. 

Enjoy.

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It was His face.

I only saw it for a second, but there was no doubt in my mind that it was His.

I wanted to scream, to see it again, to run, to close my eyes, but I couldn't do a thing except continue to stand there as my breath became shallow, my heart pounding in my chest. I wasn't sure if it was out of fear or excitement.

I saw it again, His eyes meeting mine, filled with shock and anticipation.

A hand closed around my throat, another taking hold of my heart and squeezing it so tight I just wished it would rip it out already so that I didn't have to feel it anymore. If I hadn't already been sitting, I probably wouldn't have been able to stand.

He made His way over to me, a girl on His arm. My heart sank.

He greeted me joyfully, said it was good to see me. Introduced the girl next to Him. I wanted to vomit. I smiled. Asked how He was doing. Well enough. Doing what He always did. Happy.

She whimpered inside me. I couldn't look either of them in the eyes, her at all, and the way He looked at me hadn't changed a bit. I didn't understand.

He finished. I smiled, nodded. Said I was glad to hear it. I begged Him not to ask me about myself.

He did.

I opened my mouth to lie.

"Katie!"

I gasped, startled, and turned to see Rob waving and walking towards me.

"Hey." I said awkwardly. This wasn't anything like his attempt to be discrete, especially around me.

He came up rolling his one suitcase with a backpack hanging off the other shoulder, immediately pulling me into a hug and kissing my cheek. This, he had done before, and was as simple a greeting as a handshake for him, but at this moment it was unbearably humiliating.

"You ready to go?" Rob asked, chipper, slipping his free arm around my waist.

I swallowed hard.

"Yeah." I answered with difficulty.

I turned back to Him, not surprised to see the shock on His face.

Good.

"I've got to go." I smiled again, waved, and with Rob's lead turned and walked away.

The instant my face was out of His view, the smile disappeared. I could feel my expression fall and I fought to steady breathing.

Rob said nothing, keeping his hold on me all the way out to the car in its usual place. I opened the trunk, he put his things in., then I got in the driver's seat.

I went to put the keys in the ignition and dropped them. Closing my eyes a moment, cursing my shaking hands.

Rob had the keys in his hand when I opened my eyes. He looked worried. I avoided his eyes.

"You've been shaking the whole way out." He tried to catch my eyes and I glanced at his again, the concern blaring like a horn. "Is your blood sugar all right?"

"I don't know." I managed to say, most of my words stuttered slightly. "It's probably messed up." I sighed and rubbed my eyes roughly, then fished my PDM out of my bag roughly.

My blood sugar was over three hundred, like I'd expected. Once I had it give me the correction insulin, I took the keys from Rob and turned on the car.

"Can you drive?" He asked still worried.

I didn't look at him. "Yes." I said almost curtly, pulling out of the parking space.

"Should you drive?" he corrected when I reached 25 mph still in the parking lot.

"No." I answered, exiting the airport and accelerating to 75 mph once on the country road.

He didn't say anything after that for most of the drive, I didn't either, the anger, shame, regret, and pain ragged inside me and I poured it out on the gas pedal.

On the last strip of road, I finally started to calm down a little, and Rob must have felt it or maybe his curiosity had gotten the best of him.

"Who was that?" he asked carefully.

My jaw clenched a moment. "Don't ask me that while I'm driving." I pleaded.

"Okay." He nearly whispered, turning his gaze out the window again, though I could feel him glancing at me.

The car was parked in the garage, and I went inside the house to the joyful yipping and jumping of Keila at the back door. I let her in as Rob lugged his baggage in behind me.

"Hey Keila!" he greeted her with the usual cooing and she followed him as he took his things to his room.

I went and laid on the couch in the living room facing the back, the throw pillow clenched to my stomach.

Rob must have decided to unpack and stopped paying attention to Keila, because she was suddenly licking the back of my calf.

I looked at her to see her glazing eyes, pleading, but happy. "Come on." I said, patting my side, inviting her onto the couch with me. I removed the pillow and she cuddled into its place giving me a grateful lick on the neck. I began to pet her meditatively.

Rob came in shortly after and sat on the end of the couch next to my feet. My waist twitched with yearning where his arm had been. Keila turned around climbing on me to face him, her tail wagged against my stomach. He began to scratch her head with a smile and I watched him with tired and wary eyes.

"Why did you act like that?" I asked, unable to stop the words from pouring out of my mouth.

He sat back on the couch. "You looked upset and like you were ready to run, so I stepped in." he glanced at me, apologetic. "Was I wrong?"

"No." I said, my voice thick, I let my head fall to face the couch again. "Thank you." I mumbled.

He nodded. "Of course."

"Did you know them?" he asked after a moment of silence.

I hesitated with my answer. "I used to…know him, anyway."

"Oh." Rob said suddenly. I guess he caught on.

I watched him. He sat forward, his hand rubbing his mouth, the joining his other over his knees, a thoughtful look in his eyes.

"He hurt you…" Rob looked back at me, the expression in his eyes indescribable by any other word other than pain. "didn't he?"

"In layman's terms." I chuckled sarcastically.

I sat up, Keila jumping and going completely to Rob's lap. I rubbed my eyes and before I could think to stop myself I told him the one story I had only ever told to Tristan.

My parents had been a rare kind. They had been born and raised in a small community that was strongly anti-feminist, but that had been dispersed in the time of the Woman's Rights Movement. Still, a small portion of these families held on strongly to those beliefs. A woman was to learn to be an excellent cook, cleaner, mother, and wife. Perfect, pure, and obedient.

I knew nothing else until high school.

I fell for him and with the many doors that suddenly opened to me, I realized how much more I wanted than the life they had planned for me.

I wanted a career, this imperfect guy with an impossible dream, and I wanted to make my own decisions.

I tried to talk to my parents about my plan, but they wouldn't have it. He wasn't good enough, a woman didn't need an education, and I had no say.

Desperate, we made the plan that I was to go with him to school, and we'd take it from there. The night we were supposed to meet, he wasn't there, calling me the next day two states over to tell me that it wasn't our time and that he'd be back. I was broken, but still had hope.

Two years later, I was graduating high school, without their knowledge I had applied to a number of schools, accepted by all, planning to join him wherever he wanted to go. He didn't show up again.

I wasn't going to let that stop me following at least part of my dream, so that was how I moved in with Tristan. They locked the door behind me saying if they ever saw me again, they'd kill me.

I finished my story and Rob sat back a scared look in his eyes.

After a moment he finally spoke. "What a dick."

This wasn't what I was expecting so I laughed strangely. "What?"

"Your family aside," he began staring me in the face completely serious. "anyone that hurt you like that is a dick, there's no way around it."

The tears finally filled my eyes a little. Rob stared into them and his eyebrows furrowed. "No, he's still hurting you, isn't he?"

I looked away.

"You still…have feelings for him."

I bit my lip.

"Katie, stop doing this to yourself."

"Rob." I started.

"No, listen to me." he leaned forward. I couldn't look at him. "He abandoned you and he has clearly moved on. If he hadn't, then that back there in the airport, would have been very different."

He didn't need to tell me that. I knew. He had no idea how much I knew; how many hundred times I had imagined it in a thousand different ways.

"Holding onto him isn't doing you any good."

He was sincere, but I couldn't resist my sarcastic chuckle.

"And what would letting go do?" my voice much less stable than I had intended. "I have tried." I shook my head. "I never get anywhere."

Rob chuckled this time. "You never stop loving someone until you love someone else." He muttered.

I stared at him. There was a small smile on his face and a soft challenge hidden in the light in his eyes.

"But…" Rob locked eyes with me and leaned forward until all he had to do was whisper. "you have to give yourself or someone else a chance."

I wasn't sure if I was breathing.

He was suddenly close enough that I could smell him. Not the shampoo he used or any type of cologne he'd put on, but his scent. We shared the air between us and it was like I had just broken the surface of a deep ocean I had been in. Then just as I was starting to feel the warmth of his mouth next to mine, his hands were on my face, and then he brought my lips to his.

He gently, but powerfully molded his mouth to mine, giving, while still offering to take. I was unresponsive, and when he began to stop and pull away, something cracked inside me.

A noise escaped that was somewhere between a moan and a gasp and I pulled him back to me. I was dehydrated, starving, and deprived as I kissed him, he immediately returning it. I clung to him desperately as his arms wrapped around me and held me closer. As either one of us seemed to begin to stop, the other needed more. It was natural; breath, skin, oxygen. With each kiss and each breath, my will, my fear, crumbled further, the bottle that I had been keeping that part of myself in shattered, the lock around my heart broken.

It was what I needed, and somehow, this man knew it.

Finally, somewhat regretfully, we came to a mutual stop. The fresh air that mixed into my breath seemed strange after so much of his.

Sedated, I settled into his chest, his lips still grazed my head and face. Before I understood what was happening, my chest was heaving and Rob, trying to hush me, was wiping the tears from my face. The only explanation I had was that I was crying in relief.

After a while, I sat up wiping my face.

"I'm sorry." I mumbled.

Rob looked at me, smiling contently. "Nothing to be sorry for."

He seemed to glow, if only a little, creating a joy in me that made me have to kiss him again.

In between kisses Rob managed to say, "You don't have to go home…if you don't want to."

I pulled away, hesitantly again, but carefully. I was just drunk enough on him that I knew staying would potentially be dangerous.

I smiled softly at him, kissed him one last time, sighed, and stood up.

"I better go." I said quietly.

He followed me to the door, Keila suddenly appearing at our heels. I petted her gently.

Rob then wrapped his arms around me. "Can I call you tomorrow?" he asked, sounding tired.

"Only once you've gotten some sleep." I mothered.

He laughed. "Fair enough."

"Bye."

 

I closed the front door behind me and heard Tristan perk up on the couch.

"Katie?"

"Yeah." I was still blissful.

"Did Rob's plane come in really late?" her voice became suspicious.

I set my things down and plopped on the couch. I knew I had a goofy smile on my face.

"Heh, no." I answered.

I looked at Tristan, her eyes were wide, and she seemed to choose her words carefully. "What…happened?"

"Uh." I laughed. How was I going to say this? "He, um, kissed me?"

"And?" the suspicion hadn't died, but sounded a slightly more anxious.

"And I kissed him." I smiled at her and waited for her eyes to light up.

She held me tight without a word.

What Do You Say?

 This is something I just wrote that would go to another project that I'm not allowed to talk about. ;) But I felt it was well done, and special...so I wanted to share it. Hope you like it. Comment.

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He was suddenly close enough that I could smell him. Not the shampoo he used or any type of cologne he'd put on, but his scent. Then just as I was starting to feel the warmth of his mouth next to mine, I pulled away, feeling so sick that I could hardly swallow.

"I'm sorry. I-" I heard him mumble, still somewhat close to me.

I shook my head my eyes to the floor, "No, it's not you." I could hardly find my voice.

"Then what is it?" He asked with a saddened humility.

"I-I don't know. I just…can't." I was beginning to shake inside out.

There was silence for a moment and I could almost feel his hesitation. "It's because of that…guy…isn't it?"

My mouth lost its ability to move.

I heard him shuffle, sigh, then begin to walk out of the room. I wanted to stop him, but I couldn't bring myself to do anything but stand there and shake.

"I mean, why can't you just…let go of him or something?" the sudden frustration and slight anger in his voice surprised me.

"I don't know." I managed to say.

"Yes, you do."

I wrapped my arms tighter around myself and began to move anxiously. "I don't know! I just-It just feels so wrong! Maybe I'm just…scared of letting go, even though I've tried. Maybe I'm just so afraid that if I do I won't have anything to hold onto anymore," I started to turn around to face him "that I'll just-"

I never finished the sentence. I never finished the thought. Somehow without me noticing, Rob had come up to me and in an instant, took hold of my face and pressed his lips to mine.

It wasn't like an expected first kiss, timid, asking for permission, but full, challenging, and powerful.

I didn't fight it, and I didn't want to. It was natural; breath, skin, oxygen.

It was like my will, my fear, was gone in an instant, the bottle that I had been keeping that part of myself in shattered, the lock around my heart broken.

It was what I needed, and somehow, this man knew it.

We stood awkwardly for a moment, but finally met each others' eyes. He looked at me softly.

"Don't let fear keep you from taking chances." He said wiping a tear from my cheek that I hadn't known was there. "You might miss something important."

I couldn't stop myself now. Every tear that I hadn't shed for him all these years came pouring out onto Rob's chest and he took them without hesitation, eventually sitting us on the couch.

I calmed down, breathing him in, the peace I had been beginning to feel in his presence taking hold. I took note of how easy being with him like this was as I laid my head comfortably between his neck and shoulder.

"I'm sorry." I mumbled.

"Nothing to be sorry for." He answered, taking my hand hesitantly.

I squeezed his in return, searching for his lips again, feeling the final chains falling off of my wings once I did. 

Sight-Alternate Beginning

 This is a new beginning I had for Sight clearly. And really...it's just better. I hope you think so too! Playlist

<--Previous Version

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The strongest memory of my childhood is of my mother's funeral.

A strange cooling mist surrounded me as bugs buzzed in the heat.

A tall, sweating priest read from the bible.

Only a few people came and I didn't know any of them.

No one had anything to say.

All of the flowers laid for her had already wilted under the sun save my iris. She had grown them for as long as I could remember. As the casket began its decent into the ground a hand squeezed mine. I wasn't bothered by it and something was telling me that it was okay to cry, but I didn't. Maybe I had used up all of my tears the day I found her.

She had had me sleep with her in her bed, which I, being six years old, naturally had no objections to. When I woke up the next morning three hours late for school…she didn't.

It wasn't until the middle of that night that someone found me. I don't even remember who, a neighbor seemed most likely. They'd told the officers and paramedics they'd found me crying and holding onto her, begging her to wake up.

After that it was all mostly hushed voices, sympathetic looks, a few pats, sighs, and explanations of natural causes that I ignored. I'd known as much as my young mind could: mom had always been sick.

It wasn't until I was older that I learned she had had the beta form of Thalassemia. She was twenty-nine years old. She had gotten the disease from her mother, who had gotten it from hers all of whom were long gone. There were no siblings to take me in, no living relative that wanted anything to do with me. No one had ever heard of any kind of father.

At some point I'd wondered if, with the high risk of the disease being passed onto me, everyone was too afraid of taking on that kind of responsibility, but I had never shown any trace of it.

With no other place for me, I entered a foster home. I couldn't ever say if it was a bad place to be or not. I hadn't been there very long.

I don't know if it was my mom's death that had triggered it or if I'd always been that way, but the first night in the foster home had me screaming. Shadowy figures of all shapes and sizes hovered over every other child's bed, and paid no attention to me.

I was immediately sent to a doctor, which became another doctor, and another and another until I was landed in a home for mentally ill children that frankly, they didn't know how to help. They couldn't figure out what was wrong with me. I was seeing things that left me alone and never said a word. I quickly learned that they had no interest in me and that they were everywhere, at least one with every living thing. I wondered for years if this was what happened to those who, because of death, were lonely in the world, they could see what others couldn't.

With no other means of passing time in what was mostly seclusion, I studied. I didn't bother until I was about thirteen and the things I had learned to ignore became nagging questions that would not ebb.

There was never a question in my mind about who I was. Anna Grace, daughter of Amy Grace: More than likely insane, but harmless. But the questions I did have, no one seemed to be able to answer.

What were the shadows? Why were they around every living person except me? What did they do? What did they want from us?

The more I dove into the knowledge I could get my hands on, which wasn't much, the more my questions led me to religion.

I gathered the basics of what the most commons believed but ended up concentrating on the most important aspect: Demons, spirits, ghosts, apparitions, the remains of the dead, evil, temptation.

The shadows I saw never physically harmed anyone that I had seen, spoke, and was not bothered by anything it came into contact with, not to mention, salt.

I often found myself closing this books rubbing my eyes, then glancing once again at the shadows trying to make the defining connection, but ending up nowhere. I wasn't doing too well on my own. I needed a teacher.

I asked for one and after a great deal of hassle, got one, but one only adequate enough to prepare me to earn my GED. It was my thinking that once I proved what I could do with the knowledge I gained, they'd let me research more on my own, have access to more information. I was wrong. At sixteen, when my test results came back with flying colors it seemed that every door closed on me. I fought through a long year like that. I became so desperate for answers that when I was seventeen I refused to eat. Death wasn't what I was going for, and I knew that they didn't want it either, so they made me a promise.

One more year, granted I behaved, and I could enroll in a few classes at the local college.

Eighteen. That was the desired year in this house of the destitute. There was a chance, even if it was slight, that they could re enter the world of the sane, privileged, and living. So, like a good girl, I ate, and did anything else asked of me until my eighteenth birthday.

That morning, there was no sign of heaven's light coming through my window, it was raining. No trumpets sounded, no angels sang or carried me away. I went to breakfast.

Jessica sat down next to me…well a foot away from me. It was the closest she ever got to anyone. She had such a sweet and soft face, with beautiful blonde hair, most people wanted to touch her and it never ended well. The slightest chance of human contact terrified her, always had, and by how things were going, always would.

She glanced at me nervously and held her spoon in one hand like a toddler, the other hand twitching nervously in her lap.

"Anna." She frowned at her hot cereal.

"Hmm?" I answered giving her my attention.

"Are you leaving?"

She was younger than me by four years and I remembered my fear of loneliness at that age. The moment called for a comforting touch or hug, but I had long overcome that instinct with Jess.

"Maybe." I answered.

"Do you think there will be more of them out there?" she asked.

Most of the kids in here came to accept each others' problems. Mine seemed like an easy one, but it was hard for most to think that there were shadowy figures around them all of the time, but Jess was a trooper.

I eyed the one that appeared to be nuzzling her ear. "Most definitely, if I'm right about my theory that is."

Jessica's face scrunched up. "Be careful." She whimpered.

"Oh Jess." I said as she started to cry silently. "I'll be fine. I don't think it will be any different. If they haven't paid attention to me in here all my life, then it won't be any different. I'll be fine." I smiled at her. "My kung fu is strong Jessica-san."

This made her laugh which almost sounded like a scream paired with her tears.
 

Later, I paced in my room, trying to decide whether or not I was going to go to the mistress about it. They had told me that they would make the first arrangements and let me know, but I was yet to hear anything.

My heart stopped when there was a knock on my door.

I opened the door expecting the mistress to be standing there grim faced, but a woman was not what I found. It was a man. Though "man" seemed too…simple a term. His clothes flowed over his figure like they were made for him. There was something other worldly about his face with glowing sea-green eyes and slightly wavy blonde hair that fell around his face like it was painted.

I couldn't say a word, he blinked.

"Anna." It wasn't a question, it should have been. The way he said my name like he knew me should have terrified me, I knew that, but it didn't. His smile was so genuine as he appraised me, but it wasn't in a scrutinizing way. He appeared excited.

I stepped out of the way and he came in my room, no shadow following behind him.

"Um." He said to my gaping expression, holding out his hand. "I'm Gabriel…Cephas."

I hadn't put my own hand out.

"You had shown an interest in attending classes at the university?"

I snapped out of my confusion in time to frown.

He was from the college? He looked much too young.

"Yes?" I managed to say.

He seemed to chuckle a moment, almost disguising it as a cough. He smiled at me knowingly, his face lighting up instantly, I almost smiled back.

"Well, pack your things and we will get you started."

I couldn't repress my grin now. I was getting out! I was going to finally get the answers I couldn't find in here.

I had to stop myself from running to my drawers. Gabriel made no indication that he noticed.

Once I was ready he'd taking most of my bags from me and carried them himself. I walked right out of the front doors and no one made a move to stop me. 

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Sight-Legacy

<--Previous Post 

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No one moved as the echoing died throughout the chapel. Jacob continued to hold onto me tightly as I began to feel light headed.

The father moved first, shuffling toward the knocked over pews, Gabriel quickly went to help him.

I tried to fight the tears, but when I failed, I turned into Jacob's chest, clutching his shirt and trying to breathe evenly. He gingerly held me against him and let me do what I needed.

I mumbled several things. I don't even remember what they were, but Jacob hushed me and kept telling me it would be alright.

I felt Gabriel behind me after some time, but he made no move to comfort me. I stopped eventually, rubbing my eyes and whispering an apology to Jacob. He sighed and shook his head. "It's nothing." I saw the pity in his eyes.

His sympathy only aided my fear and I craved Gabriel's comforting touch.

I faced Gabriel and his expression froze me. His eyes were hard, scrutinizing, and they studied me cautiously.

"Gabe." I nearly whimpered again. He closed his eyes, sighed, and opened his arms to me. I immediately wrapped my arms around his neck and he picked me up as if I were only a child.

He rubbed his cheek against mine and whispered in my ear, "There's something you need to read."

"At home." I whispered back waiting for the fear to let his peace in. I wasn't going to let go of him until it did.

"Let's go Jacob." Gabe said to Jake. I didn't like how gruff he'd sounded.

Gabriel carried me out to the car and I clung to him for my life.

He tried to set me down and I grasped tighter.

I heard the sound of the keys. He must have tossed them to Jacob. He didn't let go of me, carefully shifting me into his lap in the back seat and I was grateful.

In the house, he continued to hold me in the chair and I was finally starting to feel better. The ache and dread that seemed to be in my core was beginning to ebb, but I still remained encased in him taking in the holly sent of him. Today he smelled like fresh rain soaking up a warm pavement. Jacob said nothing.

"Are you ready now?" Gabe whispered after a while.

"I guess so." I answered, sitting up slowly.

Gabe reached forward and picked up a small brown book from the table. It's rough and somewhat cheap appearance gave away part of its identity. It was a journal of some sort.

"I'd told you I'd known you your whole life." Gabe started. I nodded.

"I did mean your entire life, not long after you were conceived. And so, I knew your mother." I stared at him. Not once remembering his presence in my life before a year ago.

"This was hers." He continued acknowledging the journal and handing it to me. "She wanted you to have it when you were ready."

I stared at the small book. It was needless to say that I was ready now and somehow I knew this held more answers for me.

I got up from Gabriel's lap and went to my room shutting the door quietly and lowering myself to my bed. I opened to the first page.

This first thing that surprised me was the key that fell out onto my lap and as curious as I was about it, I set it aside. I'd find out about it later.

I then began to read.

My little Anna,

I know that it will be hard for you to be without me, but I know that there is a strength in you that will help you get by, along with many who will help you. I also know that by the time you read this, you will have a lot of questions that I will try to answer about me, yourself, and especially your father.

End Sight: Book One.

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This would be the point, that I most recently decided, where Book One would end. What would follow would be Anna's mother, Amy's, story or as I like to call it The Devil Has Blue Eyes. Then after that there would be a third and final book, which I shall start beginning to compile shortly. :D